KlangHaus: Alight Here, Colchester Old Bus Depot

Tomorrow morning we leave for a weeks KlangHausing at the old Colchester bus depot. The first KlangHaus in a semi derelict building since our early beginnings at Westlegate tower. That comes with it's own challenges, like no insurance possibilities. We are now liaising with over night security guards...interesting and expensive! We have had an amazing week. Funding for the project was confirmed..that was a nerve wracking wait! We confirmed accommodation on Tuesday, again, nerve wracking leaving it so late in the day, but I had a hunch it would work out, lesson learned...follow the hunch! Listen to intuition.We are all in varying states of exhaustion but looking forward to coming together and helping each other thrive. We are on the cusp of becoming full-time artists, thanks to the continuing support and arse-kicking from the Norwich Arts Centre. I hope to share our experience, share our determination and hard work and inspiration with others. Dream and make it real.

Final week at RFH

I'm currently in Dressing Room 15 at The Royal Festival Hall. KlangHaus is about to do it's 33rd show of a run of 41. I am relaxed in here. I iron all the show shirts and do my vocal warm-ups. When we are all in here it's pretty snug, though we calmly fit around each other. Often Mark asleep on the floor or recording/writing songs. Jeron on the sofa. Sal pop's in and out. Jon pop's in and out, he prefers being outside. Lingford will pop in and out. I am often stationed at the ironing board or in the massive bathroom doing some singing or putting my hair up. That's our routine we choose to anchor ourselves. This show has been a wonderful success so far, affecting people on a deep emotional level. This is due to many reasons but Sal and I laugh about how our sexuality as women plays no part...flat shoes and flat chests. I wear a shirt buttoned up to the collar. There is something honest and different about this show. Being in the show actually makes me none the wiser of it's effect. All I know is that it feels pretty damn good to be in. My voice is just about holding up. I got too over emotional on Friday night and over-sang. Then had there shows on the Saturday. The first show I realised I'd lost my vocal power, not really the notes, just the strength. I 'Rod Stewarted' through the next three shows. I remained calm and went with it. I still remain calm, I'm curious as to it's state today, so warming up fully and gently and gargling salt water...weirdly I love gargling with salt water. Then finally I tell myself a story about how my voice will be fine, stoopid, but it works!

15 shows in at The Royal Festival Hall

This is a place in my life that is hyper real and yet unreal. I'm performing daily in the RFH, which feels like an enormous brilliant dream. Trying to maintain energy, be real, be here now. Not only are we at the RFH doing music and singing and mucking around all evening. We get to touch our audience, get close-up. Let them feel the air between us. Once installed we have a lovely time. The build is pretty painful, especially if we are stressed. So a strategy is needed, we will be working on this in the next week. We walk miles to, from and during the show. We behave with grace to all we meet. We attempt our most skillful ways of communication. This is heaven, the world and its politics are mayhem around us. We make our own world in KlangHaus: On Air and allow ourselves, us and the audience to escape for 50 minutes.

Day 3 RFH

On the first day we had to be inducted and sign lots of forms. We were in offices near our workspace in the ceiling, with a view over Waterloo. I had a moment of realisation that this is actually happening and a massive flush of pride...' We are here now'. Rosie is being complimented on her astute risk assessment. This is real. Then to work. What has been great is that over the last two days if one of us has floundered, another has scooped them up and either helped, or distracted them from themselves. We are a strong team, the skills between us are diverse. We are gonna make this show the best yet.

We're about to leave for London

On the eve of leaving. Very tired now but a good day. Collecting artwork, dimmer racks, perspex, ordered sharks tooth gauze,BNC convertors, watched Dan's new video for Jon Hopkins, a drone flight over Stiffkey marshes, so beautiful. Had artwork chopped, we were assisted by all manner of Norwich folk. Sorted a cash-flow plan, paid people we had to. Remembered at 7pm that I hadn't chased up the insurance people... Karen our event manager sent the unhelpful folks a stinging email at 11.30pm...nice! We've done our best and that's all we can do. Sleep well all and let the adventure unravel.

7 days to go before RFH

Feeling calm and determine. Today's list is to be in touch with friends of friends to help on the show, being 'hosts'.To begin the insurance form, that is now urgent! I have an interview with the EDP local newspaper.I need to send Sal the lyrics to new songs we are including in the show. I need to email the head tech re technician requirement times for the get-in week. The biggest task is gathering the component parts for book finishing. We will be taking with us Butcher of Common Sense books to sell. T-shirts will be printed on Tuesday. Artwork is being made tomorrow and hand-outs will be risographed also on Monday. Thursday we will be visiting a school to thank them for lending us 6 school gym benches. In between time we are learning songs. Last week we had two days rehearsal of the music in the country -side at the Bakehouse in Glandford Norfolk. This was heaven. Just time with the music away from logistics. It gave us focus and space and allowed us to visualise and imagine the sound of the building. We visited the building in between rehearsal days. We laughed a lot. Very lucky, delightful times much work ahead.

Rewiring for calm

I find it helpful for me to remember how it feels and what I'm actually doing before a show or set of shows that in my mind are important. So, stress levels rise. I thought I would be able to steadily plan and write songs, but it comes in waves. Waves of nothing then bursts of ideas and energy to push forward. I am making a mental note of this. I berate myself for not steadily completing stuff that needs doing. Came across an idea of work intensely for 20 hours a week and relax intensely for 20 rather than doing 50 hours full pelt. I have certainly had some days where I can't stop working and I am physically trying to balance them with walking around in the sun just thinking about anything. However, I am 50% relaxed... I think the key for me would be to do something more physical so the brain gets de-fragged. I have some exercises to distract my brain from strategising ( my default setting!) they involve eye movements and overloading the brain with menial tasks of humming whilst spinning my eyes in different directions... so,simple and yet you can feel it work! It reminds me of that fantastic discovery of how gaming immediately after a traumatic incident can stop the brain creating flashbacks. Re-wiring. I have been feeling overwhelmed, but that's just a feeling, so I'm changing the feeling so I can get on with stuff. My personal biggest stress buster is singing practice... which is handy. That's what is happening for me three weeks before the show.